Today I had a meeting with a group of amazing (younger) women that I'll get to travel with in a few months. Each couple of weeks we get together and prepare for our journey, learn what the latest is on our arrangements, read, pray, write or discuss what's going on, and basically stay in touch. We want to make this trip TOGETHER...so it takes a little work to keep it intentional. :)
So today, in our meeting, we are asked to share what it is that God's been showing us since the last time we met 2 weeks ago. A few of the other women shared really moving-to-tears examples of how He has been revealing Himself to them, or how He was sustaining them during difficult seasons. I was in awe.
I was also dumbfounded. I mean, God shows me things daily that are really amazing - but it's fleeting - like His masterpiece in nature, or the sound of a child's laughter. So lovely.
Then I remembered a few nights ago, something really upset me. (I will interject here that I learned last night in our small group, that to be "upset" is really just saying you are ANGRY! I never knew! I am ONE ANGRY WOMAN!! LOL). Anyways, stuff in life has just been stressful, and I'd decided to just set it all aside - that God has a plan and I'll just trust him with it. But I was so upset the other night, I just had to get out of the house and get some fresh air. (for the record, it was not anything between my husband and I). So I put Abbey the Wonderdog's leash on, grabbed a blue bag, and went for a walk. A power walk. In the cool night air!
During this time, Satan was shouting lies to me all around. I wasn't fit to go on this trip. If I was going to be THIS way now, how could I ever make this journey. These other women are WAY more spiritual and mature than I am. I knew I wanted resolution to the problem, but I had no idea what that looked like, nor what I expected as an answer. All I could do was pray the name "Jesus", over and over again. The more I spoke His name, the more He made Himself known, and the more Satan was defeated. It reminded me of the line in the song "Your Great Name" by Natalie Grant; "The enemy, he has to leave, at the sound of Your Great Name."
THAT WAS EXACTLY WHAT I WAS LEARNING, WHAT I EXPERIENCED.
So it's my new armor.
I know our minds lie to us. Satan likes to lie to us in many ways...and it's always been hard for me to discern when his lies appear wrapped in self-pity or "low self esteem". Now I have a simple tool to banish any confusion...just saying the name of Jesus. :)
Oh, how I love His name...love HIM...