Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Wanting Dad's approval...

Thanks Holley Gerth at {in}courage for writing about "In God's Heart, I am.... CHOSEN" this week. You can read it HERE.

I too really wanted my dad's approval growing up - isn't that normal for us to be "Daddy's girls"?? I too had to fight for attention, first from older sisters, then a younger sister, and always work. Fast forward years, my mom's death to cancer, and he's dating - so how do you compete with that??

What I found (after a long road to hoe through all the wrong ways to live) was that my heart yearned for unconditional love...my heavenly Father's love...the ONLY love that could satisfy. Since then, I've learned that the reason I couldn't capture my daddy's heart wasn't MY problem, but his. I don't mean this to sound trite, but until I learned about sacrificial love for my Father, I had not realized how selfish human love was; even love within the family.

Fast forward to almost 30 years of marriage, and a lot of growth in my relationship with God (painful lessons, of course, but He is so faithful to bring fruit!!) and we have just read "Radical" - WOW. It is not for the faint hearted, but it really sheds light on our selfishness, how wrong teaching - even in church - makes us believe we are expecting rewards for our obedience to God's word...I'm not even doing it justice...it is so much more than that.

Now I feel as if I'm just beginning to grasp the way that I can truly love God back - in the way that honors Him and keeps me from feeding my selfish self.

SO, thanks Holley, for bringing up this topic...I can't wait to see what you fill the blank in next week!!